You know those conversations you had with folks about the "one day" stuff when your child is young and the response of "yeah, one day," all the while thinking, "it's ok, it's so far away!" Yep, I had those many times! For some reason, the "it's so far away" thought would always calm my heart for that moment, because it truly did feel so far away! However, I'm now realizing, it's just not the case anymore. The teenage jump was hard, but driving? Wow, this moment has hit me hard!
Last week, Ethan hit the 6-month mark from his 15th birthday, which meant he could take his permit test! Yes, again, I had that same feeling 6 months ago that we had time, but when he asked LAST WEEK if he could take the test, I had to check the calendar to make sure it was true! OMG!!!! It took a minute for my heart to catch up to my head that it was true and indeed, he could take the test if he was ready. He spent the week studying and by Sunday, he passed the online test! It was official, he could literally be behind the wheel, with us for now of course, but he could operate the car nonetheless! I was so nervous for him, but he did awesome and passed all on his own!
The next step, the BMV, to get everything else done to make it legal. Man, I got teary eyed there and I just couldn't hold back the emotion. Yes, the clerk noticed and helped me feel better, but man I was so sad, in good way, on the inside! Here we were, my first born who now stands 6'1'' and towers me, was filling out his own paperwork and smiling for his permit picture. I was so excited for him and as I wiped a tear, he came up beside me and gave me a side hug saying, "are you crying, it's ok mom!" And, you know what, it truly is! He's growing up and I'm reminded how awesome God is watching it! This child has my whole heart and I love being his mother! These moments, though bittersweet and a constant reminder of how time is flying, I wouldn't change any of it. I finally know what my mom felt when she had to stand back and let me grow up, too. It's hard, but fun all at the same time! I mean we parents know this is the natural progression of life, but it doesn't make it easier when it's your turn to face it! He's ready, regardless if I'm not, so I'm embracing the moment and enjoy watching him as he keeps spreading his wings and doing this growing up thing! Yeah, I'm not a big fan of it.....hahaha! Brenton and I have worked hard to build our little family and I'm so blessed to have a spouse who I rely on in these moments, because man I'm such a sap! Life is happening and I'm going to hang on tight to it, just in the passenger seat now.💗
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